When Do you Stop Playing?

Never? Never.

I want to start out by saying that I was, and am still not, “good” at playing lacrosse. I’ve gotten to a place where I enjoy it. Nothing is better than running a break, slashing a goalie on the ride, or trying to hit a perfect bounce pass on turf.

But.

I probably shouldn’t be playing lacrosse anymore.

I was an average D-3 player at a below-average program (at the time). Like, I am under no illusions about my abilities. I used to play because I thought I had to - now I play because I genuinely enjoy being on a field. At least, what’s what I tell myself.

From age 19 to the present I’ve never bothered to catalog my injuries. They’re like a lost Starlog from a long canceled Star Trek adaptation. I’ve had a lot of them and they’re very tedious. For reference, I’m not a big dude. In fact, I look like a handsome tree stump with arms and legs that a magician was dared to bring to life on the edge of an enchanted forest. (Try not to laugh too hard at that visual, please.)

I’m currently preparing to play in a box lacrosse tournament in Utica, New York at the end of the month.

But you know, I feel pretty good, started hooping again to get more cardio an -

Nah, just kidding fam. I’m terrified. And here is why -

My list of injuries:

• Dislocated wrist

• Broken toes

• Sports Hernia

• Reverse Tennis elbow

• Stress fractures (Shins)

• Broken ankle

• Compartment Syndrome in both shins and calves

• Separated shoulder

• Cracked ribs

• Broken fingers

• Shoulder Impingement

• Broken elbow

• Degenerative disks (Neck)

• Torn Hamstring(s)

• Piriformis Syndrome (aka: My butt muscle is too tight. Stop winking at me.)

• Torn Calf muscles

• Ruptured PCL

• Torn Sub Scap (Shoulder)

Going through the cause of all of those injuries would be boring. And I’m sure that I forgot some. But that is 20 years of playing sports. Aside from the knee (basketball) and the sub-scap (hero ball lifting), they’re basically all from playing lacrosse. I also might have hip dysplasia, but that’s never been diagnosed because I’m not an old golden retriever.

Oh. I did forget something. I’ve had (roughly) nine concussions. Do I say nine because I want to stay in the single digits? Yes. It’s probably more than that (sorry, mom). I read articles on CTE all the time. Nothing could be scarier to someone that uses their brain to make a living. In all seriousness, every time I forget my keys I’m like, “Is this it?”

So - why can’t I stop? I’m not good. I could just coach and do some running and lifting and I’d be way less likely to be injured and still be involved with the game. I know that.

But I can’t stop.

The same thing that got me to a place where strangers willingly read my opinions and observations is the same thing that makes me play.

Last night I drove half an hour to go play in a pick-up box league where I would probably be the worst player there. I did it anyway. It was canceled for Labor Day.

I was furious.

Furious about avoiding what was sure to be physical punishment and possibly ridicule. I thought about it the whole drive home. Do I keep playing until I just keel over?

This isn’t some veiled attempt to get sympathy or even direction. I wanted to raise the subject because I have always wondered why people who have had a litany of injuries and setbacks still choose to play. I suspect that most people do it because it’s just something they enjoy. They do it until they can’t anymore.

At this point, we have all had the game taken away from us by at least COVID and/or probably an injury or two. So, we all know what it’s like to live life without it. But typing that makes me even more defiant.

I’m not giving this up. I don’t care if I suck. You have to take it from me.

Right, doc?